Monday, October 29, 2012

Halloween Costume Conundrum


Remember the Island of Misfit Toys from Rudolph? Well, here at my castle we have the Closet of Inappropriate Costumes. For the third time I have had to put the kibosh on Prince #3 choice of Halloween attire.

Last year he wanted to be a Zombie Nazi. “A what?” I asked.
“A zombie Nazi Mommy,” he replied. “You know.”
“Uh, no dear, I don’t know. Enlighten me.”
“Well, I dress up like a Zombie but I have a hat and one of those bands on my arm. With that symbol thing.”
“Nope. Sorry. Not happening. It didn’t work for Prince Harry and it won’t work for you.”
After grilling him mercilessly I find out that the video game Call of Duty features undead Fascists. Note to self: Don’t let him hang with the kid who plays Call of Duty 24/7.

Earlier this month he tells me he wants to be a Confederate Soldier. Again, no. That little gem of a costume makes the “Tom Ten Demeaning Children’s Halloween Costumes” list. To his credit it is truly frightening.

Today he decides that he will go as Death. Fine. 
Black tunic with jaggety hem? Check. 
Scary Scream mask? Check. 
Scythe? Check.  
And to totally get into character he leaves me a voicemail.
“Hello,” says this deep raspy voice. “This is Death. Would you like to make an appointment?”

Scary.

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